MinionTV

“The Last Projectionist” is Liverpudlian five-piece MinionTV's third full album. Grand instrumental rock songs to soundtrack whatever it is we are doing or thinking about in a grand fashion, be it travelling on a train, painting a line of trees or sitting at work contemplating who will next try to replicate natural phenomena with tremolo picking.

MinionTV have made this album very well. Sound-wise it’s good. Musicianship is top drawer, something I cannot fault them for. Always partial to getting a semi at the sound of a synth, I enjoyed that element to the music. Yet sadly, it’s the adherence to a tried and tested “post-rock” formula that strikes me most, so I found it to be a bit pedestrian. The music never grabs you by the balls, or mine I guess. Or whatever it is music grabs you by: the tits, the dorsal fin.

It doesnae really make me wanna shag a person; it's more of a couch-fucker this one. MinionTV has had music used in Hollyoaks, a shite soap aimed at young girls, teenagers and middle-aged gay men. If it's been paying the band's bills then alright, I can handle it, but it's hardly a ringing endorsement.

Of the six songs, five are instrumentals and only the finalé title track has vocals; that is, someone warbles lyrics on a vocoder or another vocal distorter. If anyone knows the piece of kit get in touch so I can use it to call babysitters and find out what their favourite scary movies are.

At least the mood's never low on this record. Synth-heavy opener 'This is fucking glorious' builds itself up over driving drum beats and bass whilst the famliar stratospheric guitars present the listener with a decent declaration of intent that MinionTV's ambitions would take them all the way to Wembley. Between this and the commendable finalé we have tracks such as 'Rockets don’t need fuel' which is a mildly interesting Goblin-esque jam. 'Hands' possesses a jazzy lounge groove that morphs into a bouncy castle of bouncy bounciness. In fact, 'The Last Projectionist' is so relentlessly fucking tasteful, the band should throw their instruments onto a bouncy castle until they go out of tune, then plug in again.

The title track is the only song that hooked me from the start, its warm tones hypnotising me, like a big beautiful bush. It’s moistened later on by a classic Phil Spector drum beat; things are going fab, then everything goes flaccid.  The band certainly have a knack for atmospheric instrumentals and it's commendable that they don’t rest lazily on the easily-done doom & gloom thing. But aside from that, its same shite, different day for me.

#Instrumental #MinionTV #Post-rock #Stubble #Darkwülf